Bob,Doug, Marc and Judith are greeted by Eunice, Baird and Sandy
President Doug Motz rang the bell at precisely 12:15 pm and the festivities began. Doug led the Pledge of Allegiance and Allan Levin did the benediction.
There were very few guests (see below).
Debbie, Kathy, and Carol came from Doug's office along with Alicia.
Mark Rosen announced that the new applicants for the Rotary scholarship are outstanding. There were 16 applicants, 14 of whom will reach the final interview. All of these applicants have been involved in Rotary. Mark was pleased that many veterans from past scholarship competitions showed up to help in the judging. There will be $12,000 in scholarships awarded this year and the selections should be completed by next Tuesday.
Joe LaMantia stated that all Rotarians should check their Paul Harris status. Dick Anderson has sent out a memo regarding making your Paul Harris contribution.
Allan Levin reminded all that we would be pouring beer at the celebration on Memorial Day at the Air Museum. 
Robert Wilkinson announced that he had spent the weekend with 360 high school juniors in connection with RYLA. He stated the weekend was an outstanding success.
Doug described the tree planting ceremony held last Saturday in honor of Bill Cosgrove. He said the turnout was terrific that everybody was both sorry and happy to memorialize Bill in this way.

The city picnic is coming up and Rotarians will be cooking hot dogs as usual. It will be held on April 30th at the downtown park.  Bun stuffers are needed!!!
In the absence of Victoria, Bruce, her body double, gave the joke. There was moderate amusement.

Howard won the raffle and took five dollars.
Allan Levin took over to raise the lifeblood of the La Quinta Rotary. 
Merv Kolb, fine free this month, assisted with the basket
Walter Keating "gladly paid" five dollars. People were so excited that Walter made a payment "gladly" that no one knew what the payment was for.
Dick Grund volunteered $50 in honor of a Picasso plate that he purchased for his wife Victory. I suppose there was a time when the plate itself could have been purchased for $50. 
Bob Wright and Bruce Franklin both mucked around and, apparently, gave some money.

Ben gave $100 for "everything." As Robert Wilkinson said, "Benjamin coughed up a Benjamin." 
Dr. Bruce Underwood gave $72 for his anniversary; Jeff Fishbein gave $10 for a listing; and Bob Wright gave a little bit of money for his daughter's wonderful weekend at RYLA.
Doug next almost introduced his guest Dean Apple. (Mr. Apple is a magician we later learned and a very good one we might add.)
Mr. Apple counted five cards, disposed of a large number of them, and still had five cards. Then all the disposed cards vanished. 
He caused Robert Wilkinson to vanish a cup of water off Robert's head. (Water on the brain was not the solution.) Then Mr. Apple brandished a coke bottle and produced in its place a glass of wine. Several Rotarians wanted to learn this trick but the information was not forthcoming.
He then burned and restored a dollar bill and floated a table.
Donning the facade of Sam Spade, he located Alisha's lost card in his shoe and he then did a Harry Houdini handcuff escape. Overall, an outstanding program and anyone wanting some magic at a party or get together should call Dean Apple at 760-898-3846.
Doug adjourned the meeting with the saying of the 4-way test. 
Rumors are flying:  Rotary international's new rule that Canadians cannot make up missing a meeting by attending Rotary in any US club probably will hurt our winter attendance.  Already losing money on our meals at The Cliffhouse, this could cause even more budget difficulties. President Doug has taken it in stride and is implementing his plan to round up various men and women in the Coachella Valley, and bringing them into a meeting each Friday as "undocumented Rotarians." They'll pay the same price for the fare and receive all the friendship we give to our friends from the North but will not be required to state the Four-Way Test... 
If you're wondering how this would work, it's long been a practice of the chefs at the Cliffhouse to give visitors and guests only two thirds of the portion received by badged Rotarians and reduce the price to us accordingly. No one has ever complained. Once a fellow from Washington asked me why I had a tomato on my hamburger and he didn't. I told him it was a special order.
These guests will have all the amenities of the meeting, with the exception of a full plate, and will definitely be called "undocumented Rotarians." The suggestion that they be called “Low Birds” was rejected.
This newsletter was written by Tom McDermott